For some reason, this season makes me think of my youth (because I'm so old, right?). How green the trees are, everything, it just brings me back to particularly 4th and 5th grades-right after I moved to Connecticut. Back when I would play that I lived in the woods in a little cottage. I was influenced a lot by The Ordinary Princess, I think, because that's where I wanted to live. In the little cottage she and her prince built (what was his name? I can't remember! Can anyone help me out?). In a lot of ways, that still sounds appealing. Just off, in the woods, peaceful, quiet, with my prince. Even in high school, I remember sitting and looking out at the hills and imagining frolicking around among the trees and creeks…This may have also been influenced by my interest in history, because in my scenario, it's also the 1770's.
Of course, that involves having a Prince Charming. And I would definitely like one. Is it wrong that after 22 years, I want to have a guy look at me and tell me he loves me, and have him not mean it as a friend? I don't think so. Heck, right now I'd be happy for a few dates. I don't need True Love…yet. I just don't want to wind up alone. I look around at work and see a lot of women who are much older and they're still single…and I don't want that. I want marriage and children. I mean, this is long term, but still. It scares me. I probably will die alone and my body will be found weeks later, after having been eaten by wild dogs.
However, on a more positive note, I want to share what we did at work yesterday afternoon: We sat around with rubber bands, trying to shoot a beach ball off the side of my cubicle. I was doing this with my boss. More reasons that I love where I work.
Current song in my head:
"I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues" by Elton John