I was very out of it when I woke up this morning. For one thing, it was still dark out and I expected it to be light. And the radio was playing songs from Jesus Christ Superstar, which convinced me that I was still dreaming, as I had just watched that the night before. It was actually a commercial--JCS will be playing at the Warner Theatre next month (I'm considering getting one of the $30 tickets). But it just felt surreal. Plus, it was one of those mornings where I look at the clock radio and try to figure out what exactly the numbers signify.
Yesterday I very much wanted to go and be surrounded by family and be taken care of--ideally, by my mother, but since she's in Oregon, that wasn't so much an option. It was good seeing everyone, but weird. Joan, who was hosting, recently moved, so it was an unfamiliar house. And it seems like everyone's becoming more adult-like, while I'm...not. The twins are buying a house. My cousin Mike has a girlfriend. My cousin Jake has a girlfriend and is moving in with her. I saw pictures of my cousin Dave holding his son, which is just weird beyond weird. And me...I'm in the same job. In the same area. My grandmother was guilting the twins and me about our love lives (or lack thereof). I remain stressed...and apparently whiny. And tired.
I know. I need to stop bitching. But it's gray and rainy and my cough has reemerged. And I always get kind of weird after spending extended periods of time at home alone (my Saturday evening consisted of alternating between playing Nintendo and proofreading and Carrie didn't get home until wicked late last night).
But I did get a chocolate bunny yesterday. I haven't had a chocolate bunny in...well, I can't remember.
Current song in my head:
"Back to Before" from Ragtime